i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he was CRYING into my vagina
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
