I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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