Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
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