belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
