NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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