Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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