Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
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And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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