I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I am spending my child support on dildos
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
and you fell through a lawn chair
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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