The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Can you bring me the toilet please
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
