why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
