im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
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