It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
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