Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
This is classic penis vs brain.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
