haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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