haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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