you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
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