WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
