so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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