It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
