Say something about gay babies.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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