What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Randomize
