I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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