By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
i need some magic done to my vagina
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize