Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
