Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
is wine microwaveable?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
