Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
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He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
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You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize