So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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