Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
