redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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