also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
