Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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