Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
she smelled like a LAN party
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Randomize
