If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
oh god the rape fog is back!
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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