I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
