Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
