So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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