Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Randomize
