how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
