at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
