the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Randomize
