how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
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just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
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stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.