Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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