Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
