Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
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