glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
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Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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