Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize
