No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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