Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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