idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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