he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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